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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27248080">How do you want to do this?</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/soididthisthing/pseuds/soididthisthing'>soididthisthing</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Fallout 4</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Body Image, Established Relationship, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Smut, Fluff without Plot, Light Angst, M/M, No Dick Nick, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Robot Kink, Robot/Human Relationships, Touch-Starved, Touching</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-10-28</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-10-28</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 23:54:56</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Explicit</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>3,722</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27248080</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/soididthisthing/pseuds/soididthisthing</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Nick is afraid he has nothing to offer in a physical relationship. Nate believes otherwise.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Male Sole Survivor/Nick Valentine</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>8</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>132</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>How do you want to do this?</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Follows shortly after my first Nick/Sole fic here, A Long Time Coming.</p><p>Is going to second base smut? I dunno, I am a shy boy. Discussion of sex, corny roleplay, and guided touching. Flagging as explicit coz there might be more chapters later. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯</p><p>Trigger warnings for mentions of unwanted sexual advances, fetishization. Nothing graphic.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>It had been a long day of chasing down various leads in Goodneighbor and tomorrow was shaping up to be even worse. The uptick in Institute activity was turning the simplest of cases into convoluted conspiracy scenarios.</p><p>"'All cats are synth spies', that's a new one," Nate remarked and he and Nick trudged wearily down one of Hotel Rexford's shabby hallways.</p><p>Nick nodded. "Certainly not as whimsical as 'all cats come from a secret Cat Vault'."</p><p>He stopped. "Looks like this is us," he said, twirling the room key on his finger.</p><p>Despite an open invitation to crash at the Old State House, the two decided the Rexford was more practical, not to mention, private. Opening the door, a quick inspection revealed the lock was still in working condition and all the gaping holes in the wall plaster had been patched. Even though Nick had been a familiar face in town for decades, he couldn't help but feel he was being watched more than usual these days, and it was a relief to see the room didn't afford the opportunity for bystanders to do their own surveillance.</p><p>"I'm glad there was a room free tonight," said Nate as he eagerly stepped out of his shoes and stripped down to his boxers, unceremoniously tossing his clothes in a pile on the floor beside the bed.</p><p>He stretched. "John is a great host, but I think he forgets not everyone is up for his brand of <em> entertainment </em>. I don't think I could have kept up with his lifestyle even back in my college days."</p><p>Nick stared for a moment at his partner, admiring the curve of his bare back. His eyes flicked away in embarrassment as he realized he was gawking, and he busied himself neatly folding his own coat.</p><p>"No kidding."<em> Stop acting like he's your schoolyard crush </em> , he chided himself. <em> You're 'official' now and allowed to look, ya dummy. </em></p><p>Nick placed the coat on top of the dresser, followed by his fedora. After a moment of hesitation, he moved the hat from next to the coat to directly on top of it. He continued to fidget with the stack of outerwear, adjusting it to neatly line up with the vase of wilted flowers already there.</p><p>His sudden fit of neatness was a nervous habit inherited from his predecessor and he hoped Nate hadn't yet picked up on the tick.</p><p>He continued, almost to himself, "There's also a big difference between Hancock knowing what's going on between us, and accidentally <em> seeing </em> it."</p><p>"And what exactly would he see, Mr. Valentine?" Nate asked none-too-innocently, now in the bed and burrowing beneath a threadbare woolen blanket.</p><p>"I dunno, you tell me," Nick shot back with what he hoped was a confident grin.</p><p>"Hmmm. He might see a handsome synth detective, about to join his partner under the covers."</p><p>"I thought <em> you </em> were the handsome one," Nick snarked as he loosened his tie.</p><p>"No, I'm the <em> smart </em> one."</p><p>"You sure about that, Mr. I-got-locked-outta-3-terminals-this-week?"</p><p>"Hey, it's a little hard to hack when you're being shot at!"</p><p>"Excuses, excuses." Nick sat on the vacant side of the bed. "As you were saying?"</p><p>"And then the smartass detective remembered to take his muddy shoes off before laying on the bed because he wanted to get his damage deposit back in the morning."</p><p>"Touche," Nick responded as he kicked off his brogues. He swiveled from sitting on the edge of the bed to stretching his legs out full length on the mattress. Ever since traveling with Nate, he'd been pressed into the habit of taking long breaks, and he had to admit, it was mentally doing him a lot of good.</p><p>He looked down at Nate, who had folded his blanket down to his hips, exposing his bare chest. Most nights they spent on the road, Nate had a dog-eared paperback or an old Daily Bugle crossword ready so Nick could whittle away the hours while he slept. But tonight, the nightstand was bare. Nick knew better than to assume the other man simply forgot.</p><p>He raised a brow in expectation. </p><p>"And then the former soldier, now hacker extraordinaire, grabbed his partner's tie, which he oh-so-conveniently left on, to pull him down into a kiss, away from the prying eyes and smirking lips of a certain raisin mayor." </p><p>Nick chuckled at the vision of Hancock seething in voyeuristic frustration on the other side of the locked door. He closed his eyes and let Nate guide him gently down, sighing happily. Their kiss began delicately, but Nate soon took the lead with exploratory nibbles on the other's scarred lips. The Sole Survivor caressed the nape of Nick’s neck with his free hand, lightly flicking one of the ports at the base of his skull. The synth's eyes flew open in surprise, and it took him a moment to realize he wanted Nate to do that again.</p><p>Nate broke their kiss and placed his palm on Nick's chest. Thumbing the shirt buttons there, he asked softly, "Don't you think you're a little overdressed?"</p><p>The synth looked down and chuckled self-consciously. "Didn't want to kill the mood…"</p><p>"My mood," said Nate, "is to be as close to you as possible." To underscore his point, he hooked a finger through a gap between Nick's shirt buttons.</p><p>Nick shuddered. With unease? Desire? He couldn't tell. He froze, not knowing how to reply.</p><p>"Hey," Nate said softly, withdrawing his hand. "If being shirtless makes you uncomfortable, it's ok. You don't have to do anything but be here with me." He sat up to kiss the underside of Nick's exposed jaw, but pulled back when he felt him tense.</p><p>"I'm sorry," Nate said. "I'm going too fast."</p><p>"No, I-" Nick frowned, staring at his feet, now hyper aware of how different his body was from Nate's. He felt a wave of self-loathing at the glimpse of one of his toes, stripped to bare metal, poking through a hole in his sock. He crossed his legs to hide the sight.</p><p>Nate hoisted himself up to sit shoulder to shoulder with the synth, pulling the blanket modestly up with him. He patiently waited for the other to complete his thought.</p><p>Nick glanced at him. "I guess I killed the mood after all, huh," he said, sadly.</p><p>Nate leaned into Nick’s side, relieved to feel a lean back. "I'm still learning what your boundaries are. <em> I'm </em> the one who needs to apologize, not you. We're just wired a little differently."</p><p>"Literally, in my case."</p><p>"You know what I mean. <em> You're </em> pretty careful in new situations. But remember when we first met in that vault and you asked me how <em> I </em>wanted to do things?"</p><p>"<em> 'Hard and loud', </em>" Nick recalled, shaking his head at the irony of his own double entendre coming back to mock him.</p><p>"But it's not an excuse, so, again, I'm sorry. I don't want to push you."</p><p>"No, you've been the picture of restraint. I'm trying not to have hangups, but-" Nick covered his face with his good hand.</p><p>Nate considered his next words. "If you discover that you're not as attracted to men as you thought-."</p><p>"No!" Nick interrupted, unshielding his eyes. "No," he repeated softer, "It isn't that. <em> God </em>, no, Nate, you're the best thing that's happened to me in a lifetime. I just…" he sighed. "I know you've said everything is fine, and I want this, trust me, I really do, but I still can't help but wonder what I offer, uh, in bed, other than…" he trailed off.</p><p>"Other than what?"</p><p>He grimaced. "The <em> novelty </em>."</p><p>Nate considered this. "You've been propositioned before."</p><p>Nick barked a bitter laugh. "Yeah, that's a way of putting it. More than once." He gave a quick glance over his shoulder at the nightstand, desperately wanting a cigarette, before remembering his pack of Grey Tortoises was still in his coat pocket on the other side of the room. <em> Damn </em>.</p><p>He pushed on, fidgeting with a loose thread on Nate's blanket. "This line of work -- I've run into my share of gigolos. Not my bag, but those guys know what they're about, with rules and lines you don't cross. They're still <em> people </em> , after all. I've grown to respect that and likewise can forgive a stranger thinkin' I also got something to 'sell', given the…" he smirked, " <em> theme </em> of my signage."</p><p>He looked distractedly around the room, starting briefly as his wandering gaze met his own glowing eyes in the nearby bathroom mirror. He shook his head. "But it's different when someone looking for a good time looks at <em> me </em> . Coz all they see is… a <em> fetish </em>.”</p><p>He spat out the word with disgust.</p><p>“I'm already a Thing to most folks, but it's a special kind of low to be looked at as something so<em> disposable…</em> can you blame a guy for being a little squirrelly?"</p><p>"Not at all."</p><p>Nick flexed his fingers. "I've realigned more than a few jaws on creeps who thought dropping some caps in my pocket was all it takes to make me…" he trailed off again.</p><p>"And then <em> you </em> come along, my honest-to-god knight in a blue vaultsuit. I feel for the first time in my life like I got a shot at somethin' special. But then I catch an eyeful of myself and wonder what the hell you make of all of <em> this </em>." he gestured to himself broadly with his ruined hand.</p><p>Nate inhaled, about to speak, but Nick interrupted, "I know you're not like those other guys and that you're about to say something real sweet, that I clean up real good." He smiled sadly. "But, I just don't see it."</p><p>"I'll tell you what I see." Nate said. "A selfless man who tries to carry the weight of both his own troubles <em> and </em> those of the entire Commonwealth on his <em> very </em> attractive shoulders."</p><p>Nick snorted. “Be sure to thank the Institute for these shoulders whenever we find their hiding place.”</p><p>Nate slid back down the mattress to lay flat. "I will. I’ll also thank them for your perfect mouth. Which I hope you know I enjoy kissing.”</p><p>“Ain’t <em> that </em>bad at being a detective," Nick muttered, giving Nate's foot a nudge with his own.</p><p>Nate bit down on his grin. “And I’ll thank them for your classic cheekbones and jawline-"</p><p>"Covered in rust."</p><p>"A distinguished <em> patina </em>."</p><p>"Har, har."</p><p>"Your nose-,"</p><p>"Busted."</p><p>"So is mine and I don't see you complaining." He reached up to tap the tip of Nick's. The synth batted away his hand with a chuckle.</p><p>"And there they are, my favorite, your laugh lines,"</p><p>"You mean <em> wrinkles </em>. Make me look like a decrepit old man…"</p><p>"<em> They </em> are what truly sets you apart from every other Gen 2 in the world. What makes you a <em> person </em> . Because you wear your heart on your sleeve and <em> laugh </em>."</p><p>"Yeah, well, it ain’t exactly all sunshine n' giggles with me."</p><p>"I don't expect it to be, same as anyone else."</p><p>Nick sighed glumly. "You know, Piper once tried to cheer me up by saying in a dark room, you can't tell I'm a synth. I guess she meant if I closed my eyes real tight, heh. I know she was just bein' nice, but... well, when the lights are out, it still won't change the fact that I've got some important parts missing."</p><p>"Important, how?"</p><p>"Christ, Nate, don't make me spell it out."</p><p>"Don't assume you know what's important to me," Nate scolded. "Yeah, you hit a <em> lot </em> of the notes in what I find physically attractive in a man. But you not being human… that also excites me. I like the way your skin feels. How beautifully you're built," He reached out to clasp Nick's metal hand. "And your eyes… Nick, they make me <em> weak </em>."</p><p>Nick knew intellectually that Nate loved him, but the constant and increasingly <em> specific </em> praise that Nate lavished on him was strange, new territory. He had vague memories of the old Nick being called handsome, but that was only after he'd had a good night's sleep and put on his Sunday Best, and even then, it was usually someone's grandma paying the compliment. These days, no amount of rest or fancy duds would change the fact that he was physiologically identical to the wave of synths now openly terrorizing Boston, and he was sure his tattered visage would give any little old lady a heart attack, if she didn't outright try to shoot him, first.</p><p>Nate traced the circular imprint on the back of Nick's hand. "Just one glance and <em> hard and loud </em> or <em> nice and quiet </em> … don't be afraid to tell me what <em> you </em> want and we'll figure it out."</p><p>"Oh," was all Nick could say as he tried to process his partner's offer.</p><p>"<em> Oh </em> ." Nate teased. "And I want you to know, the human parts of you and the synth parts of you -- you're a package deal, Nick, and I find it <em> all </em> incredibly attractive."</p><p>"You're determined to figure out a way to make me blush, aren't you."</p><p>"Maybe." Nate flashed a wicked grin. "As for activities in the dark, well….learning what makes my partner feel good makes <em> me </em> feel good, if you catch my drift." He lifted the hand he was holding to his lips, giving it a gentle kiss.</p><p>Nick had the heady sensation of static for a moment throughout his body. "I'm… I'm not sure<em> I </em> even know. What feels good."</p><p>Nate released Nick's hand to grasp the blanket like a cloak, hiding the lower half of his face.</p><p> "Sounds like a case for…<em> " </em> he dramatically pitched his voice lower <em> ," </em> The <em> Silver Shroud </em>!"</p><p>"Knock it off, ya big ham!" Nick rolled his eyes, grabbing his pillow to playfully smack Nate in the gut.</p><p>Nate caught the pillow firmly and the two laughed as they had a brief tug of war. Nate impulsively loosened his grip and winced at the loud crack from Nick's elbow smashing backwards into the wooden headboard. A headboard that now sported a rather noticeable split.</p><p>"A good thing I don't exactly have a funny bone anymore, or that would have hurt a whole helluva lot more," Nick chastised, giving Nate's shoulder a good-natured shove.</p><p>"Shit, you sure you're ok?"</p><p>Nick returned the pillow to behind his back. "<em> My </em> dents hammer out, but I wouldn't say the same for the bed." He tapped the splintered wood and gave a crooked grin. "I daresay, we might have just earned ourselves a <em> reputation </em>."</p><p>"God. So much for the damage deposit."</p><p>"I'll take it out of your pay," Nick said glibly.</p><p>"Fair enough, and I'll fess up to the hotel manager," Nate sighed and patted Nick's knee. The synth looked down at Nate's hand, now resting on his leg.</p><p>"So, uh… I like when you touch me," Nick said shyly. "I just don't know if I can look at myself when you do it, coz wearin' normal people clothes, well… I know <em> you </em> think otherwise, but it's what makes <em> me </em> feel different from <em> Them </em>."</p><p>Nate nodded. "Maybe I could... put my hands under your shirt?"</p><p>"I see your troubleshooting mode has kicked in," Nick said wryly.</p><p>"Is that ok?"</p><p>"It's a good trait for the partner of a machine to have, dontcha think?"</p><p>Nate frowned at the word, <em> machine </em>, but let it drop. "I mean, do you want to try it. Now. Or are you done for the night?"</p><p><em> Oh, what the hell. </em> Nick made a show of patting the mattress, his confidence returning. "This is probably the nicest room in town. So let's get our money's worth."</p><p>"Aren't <em> you </em> being romantic."</p><p>Nick scoffed. "Just following your lead on the synth instruction manual to second base."</p><p>Nate huffed at his partner's typical casual self-deprecation, but at the same time was emboldened by how much Nick was trusting him right now.</p><p>"Mmhmmm. Alright, let's see…" He mimed opening a book, licking his finger to turn an invisible page.</p><p>"Step 1, here we are<em> ," </em> he tapped the air <em> , 'when interacting in close proximity with your synth, go slowly, waiting for feedback at regular intervals before continuing further </em>."</p><p>"Ok." Nick replied softly.</p><p>Nate "closed" the "book" and then placed both his hands on the synth's chest. He slowly slid them down his shirt front until he reached his waist.</p><p>"<em> Ok </em> ," Nate echoed. He wasn't sure if it was his imagination, but he could swear he felt the synth's internal cooling system kick up a notch, heard a swoosh of coolant and the whir of fans. Maybe he <em> was </em> making Nick blush, in his own way.</p><p>He looked up at the synth, whose brow was furrowed, eyes now tightly closed. Nate gently pulled up on the fabric along his waistband, untucking the shirt inch by inch. <em> There </em>. Now he could easily slide a hand up, splaying his fingers  against the smoothness of Nick's abdomen.</p><p>He suddenly was aware of how still Nick was holding himself, eyes screwed shut, jaw clenched.</p><p>"Is this ok?"</p><p>"Yeah," Nick whispered raggedly.</p><p>"Is that a <em> good </em> yeah or just an <em> ok </em> yeah?"</p><p>Nick snorted, the corners of his mouth beginning to curl up. "<em> Good </em> yeah."</p><p>"Good." Nate smiled, rubbing circles into Nick's synthetic skin, enjoying the pliable texture and radiating warmth. He made a small noise of bemused confusion.</p><p>"What?"</p><p>"Nothing."</p><p>Nick knitted his brow. "C'mon, I'm already self-conscious as all get-out right now."</p><p>"Well, you have… a navel?"</p><p>Nick's mouth quirked. "Yeah, I don't get it, either. Something else you can ask the Institute about, heh."</p><p>"It's cute."</p><p>"You’re outta your goddamned mind." Nick said, with a chuckle.</p><p>“Maybe it's part of my charm.”</p><p>"So you're <em> not </em> the smart one, then."</p><p>"Ouch, a point to Valentine."</p><p>Nate moved his hand up further, stopping at the center of Nick's chest. He could feel a steady thrum beneath the paneling there. He hummed with satisfaction and pressed down slightly with his palm to better sense the workings underneath.</p><p>"What now?"</p><p>"Nothing, I just like feeling my partner's heart beat."</p><p>"Pretty sure I don't got one of those. You <em> sure </em> you have the right manual?"</p><p>"Ok, <em> fine </em> , Mr. Tin Man. You still have <em> something </em> going on underneath here and I like it. Don't make me invent ridiculous names for your insides."</p><p>"Hmmmph," Nick replied in feigned indignation.</p><p>Nate moved on to tentatively trace a seam along the right side of Nick's chest. He felt the synth shift.</p><p>"Should I stop?"</p><p>"Lighter."</p><p>"Hmmm?"</p><p>"Just a lighter touch. And slower. Please." He arched his back slightly as Nate shifted to his fingernails for a moment.</p><p>"Aha, is that a clue, Detective?"</p><p>"You're a real" - Nate brushed against a fray, which elicited a hiss from Nick as he felt a pleasurable crackle down his nerves - "cornball, you know that?"</p><p>"Sex <em> is </em> corny, I think more people would be happier if they embraced that." He continued his tactile tour of Nick's chest.</p><p>"I don't know I'd go so far as to call this" - Nate found the port above Nick's ribcage and Nick could swear he saw colors for a moment that didn't exist - "<em> ngggh </em>, sex."</p><p>"Whatever, who cares about semantics. You're still enjoying yourself, right?"</p><p>Nick gave an affirmative grunt.</p><p>"Good." Nate lightly raked his fingernails across the opposite seam, getting a reaction similar to before. He smiled, varying his touch as he explored Nick's torso, noting which movements induced relaxation and which led to what could only be called arousal.</p><p>As Nate's fingers wandered and gently prodded, Nick felt an internal fan step up another notch. He suddenly had the vivid sense memory of red ears and a pounding pulse. <em> Dammit, Nate, you do this a little too well. </em>He briefly wondered if his core could get hot enough this way to trigger a soft reboot.</p><p>"I <em> will </em> unlock your secrets, o’ man of mystery." Nate replied, as if reading his mind.</p><p>Another laugh. A sincere laugh. But then Nick suddenly grew sombre.</p><p>"You ok?"</p><p>"What if there is nothing more <em> to </em> 'unlock'? This is as far as I go? Even… even if I want more? To give <em> you </em> more?"</p><p>Nate rolled over to straddle the synth and leaned in for a comforting kiss. He felt Nick relax again beneath his touch.</p><p>"Remember that night at Flo's when I said us just  <em> talking </em> was intimate?"</p><p>Nick nodded, opening his eyes to meet Nate's gaze.</p><p>"I meant that. Carving out a little time and space to be able to enjoy each other. <em> That's </em> what I will always need the most. I can always... take care of myself if I have other needs."</p><p>He cupped Nick's face with his hands.</p><p>"But if you're ever feeling adventurous about satisfying those needs," Nate murmured, "I can give you specifics; I'm sure you'll do just fine." He winked.</p><p>Nick looked away with a shy smile. "Maybe an old bot <em> can </em> learn new tricks."</p><p>Nate gave him another kiss, this time on the neck, enjoying how his partner pleasantly squirmed as he got a little too close to a particularly ragged gash.</p><p>"Glad to hear it, but I do enjoy this. I enjoy your body, looking at it, touching it. If you want to touch mine, you know I'll be very happy. But if you prefer to talk or cuddle or just read together, that's ok, too. Really."</p><p>"I think I can offer a little more than that." Nick said, not without some wounded pride.</p><p>"Mmmmmm." Nate turned his attention back down to Nick's stomach. He gently slid up his shirt, exposing a sliver of yellow-grey skin, and gave his navel a feather-light kiss, followed by a firm graze with his teeth. Nick made a gasp of garbled static. </p><p>Nate patted Nick's abdomen in satisfaction. "Good, because I can, too."</p><p>He shifted again, moving to lie on his side next to Nick, pressing his body close, discarding the blanket to better entwine his bare legs with Nick's clothed ones. He slipped a hand back underneath Nick's shirt and lazily caressed him, savoring the contact and contrast of their skin.</p><p>"This is nice," Nick said, his voice having returned. He leaned over to comb his fingers through Nate's hair. </p><p>"Good, because you deserve nice things."</p><p>"You keep saying that. I'm still having a hard time believing it."</p><p>"Take your time; I can believe for the both of us as long as you need."</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Sorry for saddling you with some of my hangups, Nicky.</p><p>I don't know at what point I decided to make Nate such a goober, but he's in his mid-40s in my mind and is determined to give Nick a run for his money on bad jokes.</p><p>Dunno if I'll push this any further, but if I do, be warned that I'll be pulling from the list of "sex is inherently silly" tropes my partner and I brainstormed some years back. Write the fic you wanna read, I suppose.</p></blockquote></div></div>
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